guest post: thoughts on motherhood, by kara donnelly

it is an absolute delight to have the enchanting mama of two, kara donnelly of @wild_isthewind here today. i can't remember how i found kara on instagram, but it was her uplifting posts about her children, jameson (2) and irelynn (6mos) that's had me following ever since. she is a radiant presence and her feed is as lovely as it is genuine in it's tribute to motherhood, you really should follow her. thank you so much for contributing, kara!

You could read every book, magazine or website telling you all about what to expect when you bring your newborn baby home for the first time. But I'll tell you, there is nothing that will prepare you for those precious moments quite like the way going through it actually does. 

I remember getting my first born son ready to head home from the hospital. We were making sure he was perfectly safe in the car seat. Every strap & buckle done right. We proudly walked down the hospital pathways that led us to the truck. I stayed in the back with him & watched him as we drove away. This was it. He was ours. We were solely responsible for this tiny 6 lb little human being. It felt amazing & scary all at once. 

I was blessed to not only have my sister stay home for a couple of weeks with me but my mother stayed a couple of days & my husband was home too. I had all the emotional support I needed & yet I still remember being a bit of an emotional wreck. I was sitting in the rocking chair in my son's bedroom, the chair I had so many times rocked in while carrying him in my tummy, wishing & waiting for him to be in my arms. Alls I could do while I nursed him was cry. I felt this incredible joy. But I also had this new protective emotion instantly swell inside me. You know when you're first pregnant & you protect your body & your stomach like there is this treasure in there? That's how I was, but 10 fold now that he was actually in my arms. After I would get ahold of myself & start to think about the blessing it was to have him here & healthy I'd start to cry again. I wouldn't say I had post pregnancy blues but I certainly was still coming off the high of having him. There are just too many hormones involved. I wouldn't expect anyone to not be the way I was. 

A couple days passed & I remember making a nice spaghetti dinner & all my meatballs fell apart. I balled my eyes out so hard. It's funny to think about it now, but to me I was just so emotionally filled that I guess even failed meatballs made me cry. Haha.  

My son slept through the night beautifully the first week & honestly he's slept through the night ever since. He nursed beautifully. It was something we just understood & got with each other. I'm so thankful for that experience with him. It truly did give us a beautiful bond.  

Not much has changed since then & the week I brought my daughter home. It definitely prepared me the first time around as any first time experiences would. I'm blessed to have my baby boy. I can't remember life without him in it.